We can't claim that any of these are actually true although it did accurately know Lance Bass was gay before he came out , but they're funny as heck. According to Groupiedirt: "Groupies say that A. According to Groupiedirt: "Glenn Danzig is 'unlikable' and 'strange,' says a groupie who encountered him in Other women say he's be polite and he likes 'playing the field. According to Groupiedirt: "Alice In Chains lead singer Layne Staley is described as having a inch penis, and a sexual disappointment.
The lucky girl would be given a special backstage pass with the initials of the roadie who approached her written in Gossip groupie top corner. We stood in that heat for hours. If you want to mask the smell of groupie sex with egg burritos, here's a very affordable egg Gossip groupie maker! You're not my real dad! Sorry I've been on such a mental hiatus.
Clear rectum for anal sex. -Xoxogossipgroupie
Launch Gallery. According to Groupiedirt: "Lead singer Johnny Rotten despises groupies. Gossip groupie cousin told me that she did everything she could but sadly Lars can't achieve a full erection. The sex was probably the best I ever had and set me up with a hotel room and paid for a rental car for the rest of my stay in the country that I was visiting. Kandace is the very best sister from what I have seen. Well, imagine a food cart careening down them with innocent people in the line of fire -- and now watch this video of that happening. According to Groupiedirt: "Metallica drummer Lars Ggoupie is 'unforgiven' Hard milling definition being a sexual disappointment. Two people in the other boat were Gossip groupie. According to Groupiedirt: "Everclear frontman Art Alexakis is a selfish and disgusting lover, say groupies who've experienced him. So keep the followers coming!
Bass guitarist Jason Newsted is also a great lover, according to one lady who says that he was able to satisfy to her needs.
- We can't claim that any of these are actually true although it did accurately know Lance Bass was gay before he came out , but they're funny as heck.
- As we all know Zayn Malik and Perrie Edwards are in a very happy and committed relationship..
- The son of "Tarzan" star Ron Ely said he had a gun and pretended to draw the weapon before 4 deputies fired a total of 24 rounds, ultimately killing the actor's son
- Pulldown to refresh.
- The Cleveland Cavaliers team member averaged
Thanks for connecting! You're almost done. Connect to your existing Cracked account if you have one or create a new Cracked username. The world of rock 'n' roll isn't a place for the fainthearted. It's full of emotional turmoil, violence, addiction, and just, like, a shitload of hardcore fucking.
And often, the gods of rock like to swirl all of that mess together, creating sexual exploits so weird and sordid that even Larry Flynt would look away. Of all the possible reasons for musician rivalries, David Bowie and Slash might have a unique one. It's not that Slash ever called Bowie a has-been, or that Bowie accused Slash of ripping off one his lesser-known alter egos The Sunglass Wizard. All Bowie did was have tons of sex with Slash's mom when he was a kid.
During the making of The Man Who Fell to Earth , Bowie -- vagabond and satanic sperm incubator -- began a passionate affair with his costume designer. The lady in question was Ola Hudson, a world-famous designer responsible for the looks of other rock luminaries like Ringo Starr and John Lennon.
She's also the mother of some guy named Saul Hudson, although we know him better by the punctuation sign he now goes by. During an interview in , Slash finally admitted that he absolutely despised Bowie for being his mom's boyfriend. And while their relationship was very mysterious to the press, Slash saw it all.
The Duke was all up in their domestic life, including tucking the future hellraiser into bed like he was his eyepatch-wearing stepdad from space. Slash even saw Bowie's Major Tom when he walked in on them during, um, naked wrestling. The guitarist does admit that he always thought Bowie was cool, just not in the "it's cool to bang my mom" kinda way.
Admittedly, that was probably a package deal if you wanted to be friends with David Bowie. Although the whirlwind romance only lasted three years, Ola remained close with Bowie, even asking him to sit down with Slash and give him advice on overcoming his drug addiction early in his career.
We're not sure how that conversation started, but it probably ended with some door-slamming and Slash yelling, "You can't tell me what to do! You're not my real dad! According to pop culture, hiding an affair is a complex plot involving secret phones, meaningful glances, and constantly sniffing and re-sniffing your clothes. It's a high-stakes game, and if you don't want to lose, you better be willing to do anything.
Just ask Motley Crue. In the early days of the band, most of the members had girlfriends -- which is problematic when your job kind of insists on you sexing groupies. Not wanting to break up with the loves of their lives, but also wanting to constantly be boning other people whenever they weren't home, the Crue came up with a plan. After every piece of backstage or recording booth tail, the band would take Tommy Lee's van to a place called Naugles. There, they celebrated their infidelity with a round of egg burritos -- one to eat, and one to slather all over their dicks and balls.
Now, rubbing Mexican food on your junk isn't some old-fashioned cure-all for groupie-related STIs -- this ritual was all about the smell. The band figured that the smell of egg burrito would overpower even the most pungent of backstage favors.
And before you ask "Couldn't they just shower? Look at them. Taking a shower would raise more suspicions than coming home smelling of strange vaginas. As Vince Neil described it, "We would tell our girlfriends, 'Oh, we dropped the burritos in our laps. Maybe their girlfriends were too worried about them dying of high cholesterol to be thinking about them cheating. As we know you're dying to find out , they used the burritos like washcloths, not like fleshlights.
The Crue didn't ram their members into piping-hot eggs. At that point of the evening, their dicks were already burning plenty. As music historians can confirm, the angsty and angry nu-metal sound was developed as a coping mechanism for the great tragedy that was Batman And Robin.
Not with their shitty music, but because of all the hardcore porn they were producing. Zane Entertainment Group. On the backs of their reputations as barnstorming hooligans, these bands were offered starring spots in the soon-to-be-bestselling series Backstage Sluts , wherein famous rockers recount their wildest sexual moments -- which totally happened, bro -- while actual porn stars acted them out.
So what sort of antics are we talking here? Well, there's ICP's Violent J trying to cajole one of the performers into having sex with him because he's got the world's biggest penis a line which we're sure she's never heard before. Or how about watching a reenactment of El Duce -- of the charming "rape rock" band The Mentors -- having sex with homeless women? Or watching another singer have the world's least passionate threesome with his girlfriend and another woman?
Motorhead's Lemmy Kilmister even shows up to talk about the terrifying hour he spent laying some supremo pipe on Wendy O. Williams, lead singer of The Plasmatics. The piece de resistance , however, is watching Insane Clown Posse reminisce about a time they witnessed their roadies throwing lunch meat at naked groupies Spin Magazine. Alternatively, you can join a church or something. At some point in their lives , most people will make a sex mixtape -- a collection of songs to set the mood during lovemaking.
Nick Cannon and Mariah Carey had a playlist like that, only theirs was nothing but a loop of Carey's song about how real heroes never go soft halfway through. In , during an interview with chain smoking grandmother Howard Stern, Cannon revealed that when the then-couple had lovin' on their minds, there was nothing that got the bodily fluids pouring like queuing up a couple of her tracks and going to town on each other. Their favorite Carey anthem?
Her soft and sweeping "Hero. Or maybe it's because Cannon doesn't have any music of his own worth listening to while you're trying to bump uglies. Either way, this should come as no surprise to anyone familiar with Mariah Carey, who insisted on giving birth while listening to a recorded live performance of her own song, "Fantasy," so she could hear her fans clapping for her.
But unlike most of us, Cannon was getting off on his wife's singing long before they were married. In the same interview, he also told the world that he jerked it to the very same song , which might be the most loyal version of masturbation anyone has ever admitted to.
After their divorce, Cannon admitted that sharing those tidbits had gotten him into trouble with Carey. Maybe telling the world that he needed two Mariah Careys to whisper in his ears might have contributed to their split. At least he has her music to keep him company at night. We've already written about the sex tents that Van Halen's Sammy Hagar had installed wherever he performed so that he could disappear mid-solo and indulge himself in a groupie or nine. But that's not the only way Van Halen was entrepreneurial with his young fans.
Let's take a minute and discuss how original frontman David Lee Roth amused his roadies by sending them out on groupie scavenger hunts. From his lofty position on the stage, Roth would instruct his roadies to dive into the crowd and collect very specific girls for him to have sex on.
The lucky girl would be given a special backstage pass with the initials of the roadie who approached her written in the top corner. But that's not where Roth's impressive management methods ended.
And while it must have been unpleasant for the hotties who flocked backstage to get the runner-up prize of being felt up by a mustard-stained teamster, using women as currency did cut pack-up times in half.
Seeing that so much of his backstage dealings revolved around Roth banging groupies, it makes sense that he insured his wang. After all, if something ever happened to it, the backstage work would have ground to a halt. But everywhere else, women would rejoice at no longer being herded into Roth's fuck pen by his sound-checking border collies, and men would rejoice for never having to hear "Jump" again.
Marilyn Manson might be the wildest rocker in the business. Looking like Jared Leto having a psychotic break during the filming of Suicide Squad 2 and acting like an Ozzy Osbourne who can remember how to be metal, you can only imagine how the sex is, right?
Very bureaucratic, it turns out. Manson likes his rules , particularly when they concern boning, or "splicing the Cthulhu with two backs. Not because he thrives in darkness and shit, mind, but because he's really shy.
It's hard for Manson to concentrate, which is why he also only has sex while keeping his underwear around his ankles, in case he needs to flee the room. Makes sense, it's really hard to find black silk in total darkness. Manson's peccadillos wouldn't be such an issue for his queens of the dead if they didn't come up so frequently. The minimum number of times per day he has to engage in "sexual congress" is five, with ten being the ideal goal. So imagine having to punch in five times a day, waiting for Manson to squeeze out of seven layers of latex, and then stumbling around in the dark, knowing that if you accidentally make his underoos slip off, the whole carnival starts all over again.
Add an antique abortionist chair covered with a bear rug, which is Manson's favorite sex surface, and now you know what it's like making love to the goth supreme: like trying to play an Edgar Allan Poe board game with a page rulebook and a separate pamphlet full of footnotes. Often, fans want to commemorate seeing their rock gods by buying some merchandise -- maybe a T-shirt or some rad collectible dishes.
Really big fans hang out by the backstage, hoping they might get their hands on a guitar pick or a towel drained in frontman sweat. But the biggest of all fans won't go home unless they get a plaster cast of their beloved musician's penis.
In the case of composer Clint Mansell: "very. Being new to the taking-plaster-casts-of-musician-penises game, however, Cynthia made a mistake: She forgot to lube up Hendrix's pubes, which led to an agonizing 15 minutes of his short and curlies getting yanked out of what must have felt like cooled adamantium.
By the looks of it, maybe she didn't forget to lube the base so much as run out of it by the time she got there. Then, in one of the most bizarre heists in history, Frank Zappa's manager tried to steal her collection. Not because he wanted to protect Zappa's choir-boy-like reputation, but because he wanted something interesting on his coffee table.
And copies of his clients' dicks definitely count. Adam Wears is on Twitter and Facebook. He also has a newsletter about depressing history , if you're into that sort of thing.
If you want to mask the smell of groupie sex with egg burritos, here's a very affordable egg burrito maker! Follow us on Facebook , and we'll follow you everywhere. Even some of the most seemingly uncomplicated horror films have surprisingly deep meanings.
It's like the whole thing was written and programmed by sociopaths
I don't tell many people, only people that I feel won't judge me! We're told she plans to fight the charge , claiming she was not going too fast. Terrifying footage of the plunging cart was posted from what seems to be Halloween Horror Nights at the Universal City theme park. We're told they're just on different pages in life. A new thread on Reddit popped up yesterday asking "Girls who have slept with rock stars; How was it? He also likes role-playing.
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Bass guitarist Jason Newsted is also a great lover, according to one lady who says that he was able to satisfy to her needs. Kissing is not the same as sexual exploitation. It helped me come out and accept myself as a lesbian.
There are other various places on the internet that talked about his groupies too. It all boils down to if you believe them or not, since most are without proof. They get a chance, by looking hot and being in the right place at the right time.
The gossip lore on him goes he was not that picky though he preferred blondes. They just went their shows and relentlessly pursued them as groupies do.
If they got lucky, they got to have sex. The ones that send him their nudes until he responds. Thought he was hot and had sex with him.
They were minding their own business, not stalking him at a show. And sure enough I was right! About 2 weeks later at 3am I got a phone call from an out of state number and it was him. That started months of 3am phone calls while he was on the road, we would talk for hours until he fell asleep or I had to leave for work. The most amazing thing I can say is for all of the flirting we have never had physical sex. We had an amazing relationship and I proudly have 3 songs out there with my name in them.
One night on tour the other rapper he performs with was having baby momma drama and was in need of a friend. When the crew saw me leaving his hotel room late at night they assumed that we had been fooling around and the rumors started flying. After that I was no longer welcome and he will forever be the one that got away.
After that I stayed away until I got the courage to see him again years later. My step-daughter jokes how he stops mid autograph to watch me walk into the backstage area. I still feel like a silly teenager when I see him in a magazine or TV interview. Thanks for letting me share!! Our whole purpose is to put the groupies in the role of importance - basically the guys in bands get enough attention and we would rather hear from the groupies for a change!
I hope you understand where we are coming from :. I have had many experiences that made me feel like I was on top of the world, queen of everything, that the little world I had stepped in to was amazing and perfect. Like how are you gonna fight another groupie? Look at your life and ask yourself that! I was just thinking over how I ended up wanting to be a groupie in the first place and I am having all these flashbacks of stuff I did when I was younger.
Here is one of those stories. The summer before my freshman year I was 13 , my best friend S and I decided to go to a Shane Dawson meet and greet in the city. It was in a Barnes and Noble. In order to get in, you had to get a color coded wristband and buy at least one signed book.
Let me tell you, this was a fucking ordeal. My dad and I get there at around … the line is already around the block. Mind you, this an NYC block— not a normal block. I get in line and my dad stays off to the side.
I never did get to see that vlog, though. It was a line. All I remember, is that the disorganization of the whole thing was immediately clear.
That means they were the first in, but no one was supposed to be let in yet. Fast forward, this goes on for multiple hours. I knew going in though, that it was only supposed to be people who were there who got wristbands.
I had to somehow get another wristband out of the cashier. I got it. I go home for a few meager hours of rest before I have to go back again for our time slot. Once we get there, the situation gets really chaotic. Naturally, we go and sit inside the store. Her dad left to do something for a minute so we were just there on the floor. A girl with winged eyeliner and frizzy blonde hair comes up to me. At some point, we were told to move upstairs. Then, we were told to move outside. They kept playing fucking musical chairs with where they were going to have the crowd.
We stood in that heat for hours. But there we were. I met some other people too. One girl had colorful hair. After an extended period of time, we are finally brought into the building again and wait in yet another line. The security guard is standing right by the escalator, and from his expression I can see he is worn out. I can see her assessing the situation.
She chooses what she deems the correct moment, and slides into the horde of us that are waiting to be let up to the final level— the last thing standing between us and what we came here for. She almost gets past him, but no such luck. She goes off to the side and starts texting. My friend and I are let upstairs where we wait again. He was really nice, but by this point I was less than enthused about the situation.
I saw on Instagram that people who stayed upstairs or had different colored wristbands got to see a speech of some sort, and got to use fun props and pose with him and everything. I was a little annoyed. Still, the photo happened and it was nice. The girl who went before us, though, was having a total meltdown. I mean, hysterical crying. Sometimes I wonder what her and blonde girl are doing these days. We took the bus home. The whole day was exhausting. I asked friends.
Unfortunately, to no avail. As of now, I can only go where the law lets me. My main goal right now is like… trying to network I guess? I love music and art and the world and I need to be around people who know what it means to truly love those things and have it as an inseparable part of yourself. If you all thought this story was fun I definitely have more I can tell you about. Log in Sign up. The absolute antithesis in group image to the Mothers is another LA. There are stories of orgies, of fantastic week-ends, the same kind of stories that are told about most bands.
Monkees groupie stories Rolling Stone. I wanted to share this Metallica Groupie stories. I needed a good laugh. Louis' groupie histories. The account is locked now. Ohhh my god lmao.
Ask harrybirthdaytoya a question groupie stories Anons Ask Me. Zayn Malik gossip groupie stories rumor. Story submission from Anon. Ask tameimpala a question groupie stories and the fact he hasn't been in a long-term rship since forever what's your reasoning to believe he doesn't have commitment issues then? I hooked up with a singer in one of my favorite rock bands growing up. The band broke up several years ago and the singer is really lowkey now, but we met at a party and we hooked up that night!
He wasn't that great really, but it was awesome to finally fulfill a teenage fantasy that I had back in the day. Ask rockgroupies a question groupie groupies answers groupie stories stories. What are some of the bands you guys hang around?